June 13, 2007 RIP Dad, Pa, Ed.-

Wednesday the 13th June, unlucky number 13.
I was due to fly out to Canberra at 1am on 14th June.  Dad died at 1am 13th June.  Life is not like a movie script.  No death bed confessions, or rushing to just make it just in time for a loved one's last breath.  Life just marches on in it's mundane fashion and you are either there for the poignant moments or you're not.

Diary Entry:

We packed up and headed out of the Gorge.
Got a text message to ring mum as soon as possible......

I called as soon as I got to Katherine......Dad died at 1am this morning.

I missed seeing him by about 36 hours.

I will still head to Canberra for the funeral, which will probably be on Monday.

We had lunch at Katherine Hot Springs, there was no time for a swim.

We drove back to Darwin with a stop at Adelaide River for medicinal chocolate.

Set up camp at Lee Point Caravan Park again.

Steve drove me to the airport and I caught the 1am red eye flight to Canberra (via Melbourne).

From the beautiful warm tropics, long days, balmy nights and endless holidays to freezing cold Canberra.  Reality shock, a metaphoric as well as literal contrast.  From heaven into hell.  From a family who loved and supported me to one in utter turmoil at the loss of a loved parent and grandparent.  The ugly realities of life and death in stark contrast to the idyllic world that I had been inhabiting.

Thursday 14 June

Freezing cold at Canberra. Snow all around. Pete is stuck at Braidwood because of snow on the Kings Highway.
Cold Windy and Rainy.
Murray and Sharon picked me up from the airport.  They took me to Chifley.  Mum was very happy (teary) to see me.

Met with Julie the funeral director.  Murray, Gary, Lezah and Terry were there too - Peter via loud speaker on his phone.  I felt a quite cold reception from Lezah and Terry.

Mum and Gary are confirmed chocoholics.  Dark chocolate is their new vice.

Friday 15 June

Met with Father Laurie, the priest from Mum's church, to organise the service. We have decided to bury dad in a double plot - mum to go on top.
He is having a Roman Catholic service and being buried in the Roman Catholic section of Woden's Lawn cemetery- The Catholics got him in the end!

Got to come up with hymns and organise eulogies. I am a bit worried that Peter might go on a bit, he does like to talk! The Priest was looking worried too, as if he thought that the service might get out of hand.
We have decided to have eulogies from Murray, Pete and Terry, and a joint one from Emily, Leona, Jamie and Lou.

Saturday 16 June

Organising Order of Service.
I wrote out Prayer of the Faithful.

Everyone seemed pleased with the outcome.
Had a look around Woden Cemetery and picked a plot in the bit that we liked the best.  Mum and Pete came too.  We picked a spot under a gum tree with a 'view' towards the Football grounds.  Pretty sure Dad would like his final resting place.

Sunday 17 June

I had another look through the cemetery, this time with Gary, Murray, Sharon and mum.

It is a busy household at mum's with so many people coming and going.  We all just seem to keep eating, drinking tea and consuming chocolate.  I will be very cuddly by the time I get back to Darwin.

Monday 18 June

We picked the plot for dad's grave, and had our final meeting with Father Laurie and Julie.  The order of service has been finalised and dad's clothes organised.  We are burying him in nice warm clothes, must be something to do with it being winter here, and he was always complaining about how cold he felt in his last weeks of life.

Sarah, one of Pa's Grand kids, wearing the fishing hat

We will place a copy of Some Came Free (the first published book that he wrote), his walking for pleasure medals (though I think in retrospect, we decided against putting these in and left them out in case the grand kids wanted them.  I believe we currently have them hanging up in mum's nursing home bedroom), and his fishing hat on the coffin.  Apparently Pa was very proud that he had a picture of every grandchild wearing that fishing hat.  Here's one with Sarah, so he certainly got her.  The current hat is looking a bit more battered and has more badges on it than this photo, so the photo was taken a little while ago.

Shirley and Bernie (dad's cousin) turned up today from their home in Grafton, NSW.

Tomorrow is the funeral, and the subject on another post..........